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U.S. Army Special Forces
"The Green Berets"

The Creation (Airborne Version)

And the Lord spake forth unto the heavens
and said, "let there be Airborne."
The earth did tremble and quake
and the waters did rise up
and the clouds did part
and there came forth
a multitude of parachutes that filled the sky.
God looked down and saw this was good.
And they were good; they were AIRBORNE.

God then spake forth unto the land and said:
"Let there be Rangers."
And all at once the day turned into darkness,
and the winds did howl,
and mountains crumbled into the sea,
and the great rocks did part,
and there sprang forth
a horde of Mephistopheles' disciples
wearing Ranger tabs and
carrying all sorts of deadly weapons.
God looked down and saw that this was bad.
And they were bad; they were RANGERS.

Then God spoke forth thrice,
unto the sky, the earth, and the sea, and said:
"Let there be Special Forces."
Lightning did flash and echo across the sky.
Mountains spewed molten rock
and rained fire upon the land.
Tidal waves surged against the shore.
Dispair, disorder and turmoil did prevail.
Forthwith, there did appear
a band of twelve extraordinary men.
A few came from beneath the waves;
others jumped from the sky;
and more still stalked silently from the dense forests.
Each one was in camouflage battle dress,
wearing a Green Beret.
Working together, they brought peace unto the land.
God looked down and saw that this was amazing.
And they were amazing;

Besides himself,
God now spake forth again and commanded:
"Let all ye that be weak in mind and body,
arise and go forth."
And lo, from the abyss
they crawled forward with indecision
and limped weakly upon the earth.
God looked down and shook His head,
for this was pathetic.
And they were pathetic; they were LEGS*.

* LEGS: n, Pathetic ground-dwelling creatures that must walk to get to where they wish to go. a.k.a. Non Airborne Personell

Legs in Perspective: (Airborne Version)

"It only took one United States Paratrooper to turn the tide of battle and hold up the enemy attack during the "Battle of the Bulge".

"It takes two legs to just to hold up a chicken ass."


This page is an unofficial document and does not represent information endorsed by the United States Government, the United States Special Operations Command or the United States Army Special Operations Command. However, most information is derived from those sources and has been checked for accuracy. For comments, questions, and suggestions, please go to the Communications Center.

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